We are witnessing a somewhat recent—yet long overdue—movement within the Church, a movement that seeks to address and expose the egregious problem of abuse. More specifically, this abuse is often understood to mean the taking advantage of and harming of individuals who are generally more vulnerable (usually women and children, although abuse can happen to anyone). This focus on the primary problem (the actual abuse) has also shed light on the problems associated with it: namely, how the sin and Continue Reading
Thirteen Marks of Manipulators And Abusers
HOW TO RECOGNIZE MANIPULATION AND ABUSE | The following is a list of thirteen common marks of manipulators and abusers. Simply put, the more of these characteristics you see in someone, the more likely it is that you are dealing with a manipulator or abuser. 1 | STUBBORNManipulators and Abusers (M/A'S) usually possess a high level of stubbornness (as well as pride and/or hard-heartedness). They are known to stubbornly refuse to admit or yield to what they know is the truth. 2 | AVOIDS Continue Reading
Enablers of Abuse (In The Church)
THE GOOD OL' BOYS CLUB | Those who enable abusers often have just as much responsibility as those who abuse. And those who enable abusers in the church have even more to answer for. The Good Ol’ Boys Club is the tendency to circle the wagons for friends—for those in the “in” group (those in power)—rather than seek the truth, no matter who might be guilty. The mentality here is usually along the lines of: “Friends protect friends, no matter what … no matter what the truth is;” or “Friends Continue Reading
Forgiveness And Trust
FORGIVENESS DOES NOT EQUAL TRUST | Forgiveness has nothing to do with what a person deserves. Which is what grace, mercy, and forgiveness are all about. None of us deserve these things. Trust, on the other hand, has a great deal to do with what a person deserves (e.g., “worthy” of trust). Perhaps that is why we have the word “trustworthy,” but there is no such word as “forgiveworthy.” --from Mark's new book on Forgiveness & Trust (coming soon!) Continue Reading